What do you think of when someone says the word "prostitute"? To be perfectly honest, I grew up in a small town, and it was a word that was avoided - in my life, in my school, in my home. We were far from what Americans would consider rich, but we were always well provided for. I knew people existed who were homeless, people who felt that they had to go to extremes to survive sometimes, but I never thought about it. It was always one of those "not here, not people I know" things.
Last night a memory emerged though, as a friend picked out a song from my childhood to play on his ipod. Reba McIntyre's Fancy. I never knew why I liked it as a child, but I was singing its lyrics long, long before I ever had a clue what they meant. When I heard it last night, though, the power of what it meant fell like stones in my stomach.
About a year ago, God awakened me to a passion for people on the streets, for women who feel like they are not worth anything more, for people who are trifficked. Last night, He gave me proof that the verses that I have grown up knowing are so much more than real. He showed me that before I ever even knew what a real relationship with Him was, He was creating in me a passion and a love for the people He was calling me to.
We are called to love all people. God is calling all of His creation back to Himself, and He has a purpose for each of us. How can anyone imagine differently?
"My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." Psalm 139:15-16
"And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." Romans 8:27-28
"Efforts and courage are not enough without purpose and direction." - John F. Kennedy
Tuesday, August 14
Sunday, April 22
"Enough"... what does this word mean?
Tonight I looked back at 3 years ago while I was in China, and I discovered a word study done on the words "total trust." From my friends I received responses such as absolute, without fail, committed to the care of another; and then there were the responses that I can't forget. "Opening yourself to be vulnerable and believing that only good can come of it." "Trust is walking off of a cliff knowing that one of two things will happen: 1)you'll sprout wings and fly, or 2)there will be a trampoline at the bottom of the cliff waiting to catch you."
In a time and place where I could do absolutely nothing else, I learned what it meant to fully rely on and have TOTAL TRUST in my Savior. Now, I find myself at college again, and stressed as the semester draws to a close. Stressed with work, stressed with school, stressed over the fact that there is NEVER enough time to spend with my friends or with God. sigh.
And tonight all God has said, in every email or blog I have read, is "enough." Hiding in the shadow of my wings is enough. So what does this word mean? A few different places I stumbled upon in looking it up in the Bible is Joel 2 (v.19) and Haggai 1 (v.6). Reading the two of these in context caught my attention. In Joel, the Lord tells His people to return to Him, and when they do, he pours out "grain, new wine and olive oil, enough to satisfy you fully." In Haggai, the people are searching for any other way to be filled other than in God Himself, and God "called for a drought on the fields and the mountains, on the grain, the new wine, the olive oil and everything else the ground produces, on people and livestock, and on all the labor of your hands." The same exact things that He pours out in Joel, He withholds in Haggai.
Grain makes bread, right? And wine in the Old Testament is the choice drink for celebration? In the New Testament, Jesus Himself becomes these. If we choose to turn to Him, He IS our bread, our wine, ENOUGH to satisfy us fully.
Have you ever sat at a wedding and watched the bride and groom walk down the aisle and all you knew was that the whole moment was beautiful? It was filling? It just seemed right? Do we make time to have those moments with Jesus. There is so much He wants to tell us. How often do we let Him be ENOUGH??
"How priceless is Your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of Your wings. They feast on the abundance of Your house; You give them drink from Your river of delights. For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light we see light."- Psalm 36:7-9
Tonight I looked back at 3 years ago while I was in China, and I discovered a word study done on the words "total trust." From my friends I received responses such as absolute, without fail, committed to the care of another; and then there were the responses that I can't forget. "Opening yourself to be vulnerable and believing that only good can come of it." "Trust is walking off of a cliff knowing that one of two things will happen: 1)you'll sprout wings and fly, or 2)there will be a trampoline at the bottom of the cliff waiting to catch you."
In a time and place where I could do absolutely nothing else, I learned what it meant to fully rely on and have TOTAL TRUST in my Savior. Now, I find myself at college again, and stressed as the semester draws to a close. Stressed with work, stressed with school, stressed over the fact that there is NEVER enough time to spend with my friends or with God. sigh.
And tonight all God has said, in every email or blog I have read, is "enough." Hiding in the shadow of my wings is enough. So what does this word mean? A few different places I stumbled upon in looking it up in the Bible is Joel 2 (v.19) and Haggai 1 (v.6). Reading the two of these in context caught my attention. In Joel, the Lord tells His people to return to Him, and when they do, he pours out "grain, new wine and olive oil, enough to satisfy you fully." In Haggai, the people are searching for any other way to be filled other than in God Himself, and God "called for a drought on the fields and the mountains, on the grain, the new wine, the olive oil and everything else the ground produces, on people and livestock, and on all the labor of your hands." The same exact things that He pours out in Joel, He withholds in Haggai.
Grain makes bread, right? And wine in the Old Testament is the choice drink for celebration? In the New Testament, Jesus Himself becomes these. If we choose to turn to Him, He IS our bread, our wine, ENOUGH to satisfy us fully.
Have you ever sat at a wedding and watched the bride and groom walk down the aisle and all you knew was that the whole moment was beautiful? It was filling? It just seemed right? Do we make time to have those moments with Jesus. There is so much He wants to tell us. How often do we let Him be ENOUGH??
"How priceless is Your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of Your wings. They feast on the abundance of Your house; You give them drink from Your river of delights. For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light we see light."- Psalm 36:7-9
Wednesday, November 2
Unconditional
Something that I've grappled with over the past month or so is what our/my identity is. I'm in the dorms at TFC, and around mostly younger girls. I therefore tend to do things very similar to them. For as long as I can remember I associated my identity with the things I did, and the people I was around. Over the past couple of years though, that has bounced around so much as I assimilated myself to fit into the setting around me. I think part of this stems from the idea I received growing up that a "good Christian" did certain things and did not do certain things. There was such a HUGE emphasis on this. Well, as I've bounced literally all over the place in what role I am in for the month or year, I've learned that the only basic truth, the only thing that deserves the label of identity, is the fact that I am a child of Christ. God calls us to do different things at different stages in our lives to relate to other people, or sometimes just to glorify Himself. King David was so caught up in worship that he danced naked before the Lord. That did not make him crazy, and it didn't make him more child-like. It was simply an action of pure obedience and reverence.
This identity, as stated in Ephesians 3, says we are "fellow heirs, members of the same body, and sharers in the promise in Christ Jesus through the gospel." That is who we ARE.
And in similar form, I've heard so many different takes on the love of Christ, and the forgiveness of sin, that it literally left me hurting for a while in confusion. As a child of Christ, I am love UNCONDITIONALLY. That means that no matter what I do, God is not going to love me more or less because of it. His love is NOT dependent upon our actions. This has been such a hard concept for me to grasp. God is not going to love me more because I do something for Him, and He isn't going to love me less because I do not obey Him. His love STAYS THE SAME! He might get frustrated or hurt with me or He might even be proud of me for listening to Him, but unlike human love, those feelings do not change the amount He loves me! John 13:1 says "...[Jesus] having loved His own who were (ARE) in the world, He loved them to the end." This in the Greek could also be "...His beloved, in the world, He loved them to the uttermost." If He loved us to the uttermost when He was fully man, when one of those He loved that much was about to betray Him in the worst possible way, and another was about to disown Him (THREE TIMES!), how much more can He love us now that He has been glorified and is with the Father! NOTHING anyone can do or say can change that amount of love.
This identity, as stated in Ephesians 3, says we are "fellow heirs, members of the same body, and sharers in the promise in Christ Jesus through the gospel." That is who we ARE.
And in similar form, I've heard so many different takes on the love of Christ, and the forgiveness of sin, that it literally left me hurting for a while in confusion. As a child of Christ, I am love UNCONDITIONALLY. That means that no matter what I do, God is not going to love me more or less because of it. His love is NOT dependent upon our actions. This has been such a hard concept for me to grasp. God is not going to love me more because I do something for Him, and He isn't going to love me less because I do not obey Him. His love STAYS THE SAME! He might get frustrated or hurt with me or He might even be proud of me for listening to Him, but unlike human love, those feelings do not change the amount He loves me! John 13:1 says "...[Jesus] having loved His own who were (ARE) in the world, He loved them to the end." This in the Greek could also be "...His beloved, in the world, He loved them to the uttermost." If He loved us to the uttermost when He was fully man, when one of those He loved that much was about to betray Him in the worst possible way, and another was about to disown Him (THREE TIMES!), how much more can He love us now that He has been glorified and is with the Father! NOTHING anyone can do or say can change that amount of love.
Sunday, September 25
What do I do with this, God?
Friday nights. Atlanta Outreach. Making friends, hanging out with anyone we can find. (All while being safe of course.) Well, this Friday night I had a moment that I almost shut down. I was overwhelmed. There is a building.. well, two actually that are thought to be more than just buildings. And not in a good way.
I didn't know what to feel for those inside. For those of you who know me well and are reading this, you know that I pick up on others' emotions super easily. Well, there were probably twenty million things going through my mind at that point, the least of which definitely NOT being the scenes from Redeeming Love. Of course, we didn't actually go in, or see anything at all really, but I felt it. I could feel the insane mix of emotions around me. I didn't know what to do with it. I said as much to God, all night, all the next morning.
It took me until the next afternoon, yesterday afternoon, to come to grips with the fact that Dad may be calling me to minister to them somehow. To slow down, to accept the burden He's given me, that He KNOWS I can bear (because He made me!), and to start really doing something. For now, that something might be prayer, hardcore, fighting for these girls in the spiritual realm. And I'm okay with that. And I'm ok if or when He says there's more, more to do, more ways to fight, what ever He hands me. I'll do it.
I didn't know what to feel for those inside. For those of you who know me well and are reading this, you know that I pick up on others' emotions super easily. Well, there were probably twenty million things going through my mind at that point, the least of which definitely NOT being the scenes from Redeeming Love. Of course, we didn't actually go in, or see anything at all really, but I felt it. I could feel the insane mix of emotions around me. I didn't know what to do with it. I said as much to God, all night, all the next morning.
It took me until the next afternoon, yesterday afternoon, to come to grips with the fact that Dad may be calling me to minister to them somehow. To slow down, to accept the burden He's given me, that He KNOWS I can bear (because He made me!), and to start really doing something. For now, that something might be prayer, hardcore, fighting for these girls in the spiritual realm. And I'm okay with that. And I'm ok if or when He says there's more, more to do, more ways to fight, what ever He hands me. I'll do it.
Thursday, September 1
Sharing in the load
For those of you following this, I apologize for being so lax in posting. I've now been in Toccoa, Georgia for two weeks. That's a bit crazy to me in and of itself. It seems in some ways that I arrived just yesterday, but more often that I've been here and known some of these people and places my entire life. It's amazing to say the least. And I thank Jesus every day for bringing me here.
I have learned so much already! My classes all point me toward more of Jesus. For someone who grew up in a community that is afraid to go deep with Jesus, that's a HUGE deal. We pray before every class. We worship together at least 3 days of the week. We have small groups that will soon become much more like family than just friends.
Even with all of this, with the history of Christ, the story of the Bible, the hope and love for missions being presented to us in every class, it is easy to get bogged down. It's still school. It's still classes, still homework, still deadlines and tests. I know that seems crazy, but I've learned this past week that REGARDLESS of where you are in the world, if you're heart is not on worshiping and loving Jesus, then even learning about Him and His life can become almost more of a chore. It can easily become an idol. Jesus HAS to be my PRIMARY EVERYTHING.
So if you're stressed and trying to figure out how you're going to fit everything into your day, just remember to put Jesus at the top of your to-do list. In doing so, you will find joy in what you do, freedom from the stress and physical results of stress (headaches and such), and you're much more likely to get it all done, because there will be two of you working to knock out that list.
"Many hands make light work." Let Jesus be one of those additional sets of hands. He wants to. That I can promise. Psalm 68:19 says "Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears our burden,The God who is our salvation."
I have learned so much already! My classes all point me toward more of Jesus. For someone who grew up in a community that is afraid to go deep with Jesus, that's a HUGE deal. We pray before every class. We worship together at least 3 days of the week. We have small groups that will soon become much more like family than just friends.
Even with all of this, with the history of Christ, the story of the Bible, the hope and love for missions being presented to us in every class, it is easy to get bogged down. It's still school. It's still classes, still homework, still deadlines and tests. I know that seems crazy, but I've learned this past week that REGARDLESS of where you are in the world, if you're heart is not on worshiping and loving Jesus, then even learning about Him and His life can become almost more of a chore. It can easily become an idol. Jesus HAS to be my PRIMARY EVERYTHING.
So if you're stressed and trying to figure out how you're going to fit everything into your day, just remember to put Jesus at the top of your to-do list. In doing so, you will find joy in what you do, freedom from the stress and physical results of stress (headaches and such), and you're much more likely to get it all done, because there will be two of you working to knock out that list.
"Many hands make light work." Let Jesus be one of those additional sets of hands. He wants to. That I can promise. Psalm 68:19 says "Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears our burden,The God who is our salvation."
Thursday, June 23
Nothing but smiles..maybe a little contemplation
This week, while once again not at all what I've expected, has been amazing. After lots of time with family and old friends, I feel like I have a ton of stories to tell, but I'll jump to the one that made me think, "oh yeah, I could totally blog about that."
I got a chance to hang out with an old friend just tonight actually. I was nervous. It had been a while. And you almost always have those awkward silences. But never to fear. I asked Yesu (Jesus) to hold my hand, to stay there beside me every step, and He more than did. No dull moments, no lulls in conversation, and even some really good food for thought. And before I left, He even gave me the scripture of Proverbs 17:17. The first part says "a friend loves at all times," which allowed me to set aside fear and know that I would be able to talk to him regardless.
To kinda get the ball rolling, the place we had walked into had scratched on the wall in chalk: "I believe in nothing; everything is sacred." On the opposite wall, "I believe in everything, nothing is sacred."
I understood the first better. He understood the second. Not to say that I truly believe in nothing, but I love the concept of this... To each person out there, there is something within them, a passion, that makes their world light up. It feels like in that moment, everything is "right." He went on a bit later to say that when he loved music, and that when he played for the first time in a rock band, it was EXTREME. We're made to feel that. We're made to find that. And ultimately, we're made to USE that.
First, we're given a passion for Christ, for God, and because of that, for all that is good. Admit it, somewhere inside, you have a longing to change something about the world and make it better. When you're little, people say you can do anything you want, be anyone you want. When we get old, we call it common sense that we back off of those dreams and settle. It's really fear. Just so you know. Find your passion, USE it to change the world. Don't settle for something you can live with. Even you adults, reach for that dream that seems ridiculous and beyond possible. Because, hey, to God, ALL of our dreams, even the biggest ones you can imagine, seem tiny.
I got a chance to hang out with an old friend just tonight actually. I was nervous. It had been a while. And you almost always have those awkward silences. But never to fear. I asked Yesu (Jesus) to hold my hand, to stay there beside me every step, and He more than did. No dull moments, no lulls in conversation, and even some really good food for thought. And before I left, He even gave me the scripture of Proverbs 17:17. The first part says "a friend loves at all times," which allowed me to set aside fear and know that I would be able to talk to him regardless.
To kinda get the ball rolling, the place we had walked into had scratched on the wall in chalk: "I believe in nothing; everything is sacred." On the opposite wall, "I believe in everything, nothing is sacred."
I understood the first better. He understood the second. Not to say that I truly believe in nothing, but I love the concept of this... To each person out there, there is something within them, a passion, that makes their world light up. It feels like in that moment, everything is "right." He went on a bit later to say that when he loved music, and that when he played for the first time in a rock band, it was EXTREME. We're made to feel that. We're made to find that. And ultimately, we're made to USE that.
First, we're given a passion for Christ, for God, and because of that, for all that is good. Admit it, somewhere inside, you have a longing to change something about the world and make it better. When you're little, people say you can do anything you want, be anyone you want. When we get old, we call it common sense that we back off of those dreams and settle. It's really fear. Just so you know. Find your passion, USE it to change the world. Don't settle for something you can live with. Even you adults, reach for that dream that seems ridiculous and beyond possible. Because, hey, to God, ALL of our dreams, even the biggest ones you can imagine, seem tiny.
Sunday, June 19
ABC Use Me
I can't imagine how to put this week into words that would be adequate. I had this vision of walking into Tuscaloosa and helping people with the wreckage, pulling up debris, searching for sentimental items in destroyed houses. It didn't happen like that at all. I got to serve, to be a part of a family, to see 60 children become my brothers and sisters. Our fun VBS song "You're my brother, sister, friend..." became a reality.
I've been to the other side of the world. I've seen pictures of the dying in Africa. I feel their pain in my heart. And I've always longed to "GO" and make the world better, to somehow do something about it. But this past week, I went two hours away and saw "war zone footage" right in front of me. It's easy enough to close your eyes to the devestation from all of the natural disasters lately. It's easy enough to pretend like my life has nothing to do with that, to send up a quick prayer of thanks and move on like nothing happened. But it did. And it brought me to a neighborhood of children that are ignored and cast out. Precious children that long for a hug or someone to tell them "no" (and really stick by it) just one time.
These precious babies, as well as young ladies and men who are almost grown, are living on water that is still contaminated from the April 27th storms. These wonderful babies had to sit and watch the tornado come across the end of their road, and now are frightened out of their minds when it gets stormy. I can't explain how much I fell in love with them, here, in Alabama. The unwanteds. Jesus, please stick by my new friends. Please be their support.
1 Thes 3:10 Night and day we pray most earnestly that we may see you again and supply what is lacking in your faith. 11 Now may our God and Father himself and our Lord Jesus clear the way for us to come to you. 12 May the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other and for everyone else, just as ours does for you. 13 May he strengthen your hearts so that you will be blameless and holy in the presence of our God and Father when our Lord Jesus comes with all his holy ones.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
