So I was on my way home last night and when I was getting in my car, I noticed how amazing the moon looked. It was huge and bright and definitely an eye catcher. Just one of those things that makes you sigh and think "oh wow. Thanks for the reminder of Your beauty Father!" So I pulled out of the parking lot at Hardee's where I had met my Dad to go to the TN line to take a load of logs, and as I headed this way, I started entering Heflin town limits and there were street lights scattered about. I had been trying to keep my eye on the moon occasionally, just because it was so ridiculously gorgeous, and I realized that when I passed these street lights, the moon seemed so dull in comparison.
And that got me thinking.. We know that the sun's light, even reflected off of the moon, is so so much brighter than the filaments in these little street lights. It has to be that much brighter, just to be possible for us to see it from so far away. And I thought, how often do we choose things that seem so much brighter in the here and now, when we KNOW that God's hand in our lives, HIS plans for us, are really so much better, so much brighter? We KNOW what's coming when we die, and yet so much of the time, we choose to live in the here and now, rather than for what's coming...
"If you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any fellowship with the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and purpose. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others." Philippians 2:1-4
Thursday, August 26
Monday, July 19
Dad? or disrespectful?
I still remember (very vividly) one day that my heavenly Father became a lot more personal. When I was in Auburn, Liz McCollum introduced the idea to me, but that was a bit beyond my grasp. I mean, how could I justify calling the creator of the entire universe “Daddy”? And wasn’t that disrespectful?! But then… one day on the other side of the world, the day of my team Thanksgiving party, I was freaking out. I had let worry consume me. There are a number of times that I can remember absolutely falling apart from worry (I mean knock down drag out almost paralyzed me hyperventilating), usually because I was running late for something important. Well, this day was one of those days. I wanted to be at the hotel early because I was setting up an area with encouragement posters for people to sign. It was going to be close. I had come back to my sister’s apartment with what I thought was plenty of time to get ready. I didn’t leave a lot of spare room for things to happen, and unfortunately, that’s usually when everything tends to go wrong right?
Well, that day, I was also MC’ing, which I wasn’t overly thrilled about, but that meant I absolutely could NOT be late. (Somewhere in all of my falling-apartness I also forgot that I was in a different country, and all times are relative.) So anyway, I was at home, had gotten my shower, making a mental list in my head of what all I needed to happen before I left and once I got there. Well, I had to find an outfit, which took a little longer than planned because the perfect one, my zipper on my jeans wouldn’t work. It zipped up and down, it just didn’t attach the two sides together. And I just couldn’t find anything else (and I realize now just how childish that sounds). Granted, not many days before all of this, my suitcase had been left in the back of a taxi with half of my wardrobe in it, so it really was kinda slim pickens in my closet. Well, I postponed the zipper to try to do something with my hair, and it wouldn’t cooperate for the world. It wouldn’t do anything. Sigh. By that point I was ready to scream. I had to pause and help Abigail where she had had an accident in the floor. I still had to get online and print or write down directions to this place. It was nightmarish. On top of everything I was not at home (my Ranburne home, or even Auburn). I couldn’t find something familiar, curl up and catch my breath. And I lost it. Bawling, I sat on the edge of my bed and cried and cried, and finally asked God to help. Well, after a couple more tries and when I let God teach me how to breathe again, I finally got my zipper to work, and had this image pass through my head of what I could do with my hair. I have no doubt in my mind that it was from God. So, it worked, and was actually cute. (And I’ve never been able to get my hair to do that same thing since!) I got everything written down and was out the door. Daddy had taught me how to breathe again. He was even still there when I freaked out (just a little this time) at the fact that there were NO taxis going that far south. Lol. Figures, right? Well, miraculously, I made it on time, early in fact. But that day, He became my Dad, one who wanted me to cry out to Him for help. He was the one that didn’t run away from my breakdown, but helped me through it, giving me solutions that only He could. They might seem like simple things, but haha.. never tell someone who is hyperventilating that their problems are simple.
"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7
Well, that day, I was also MC’ing, which I wasn’t overly thrilled about, but that meant I absolutely could NOT be late. (Somewhere in all of my falling-apartness I also forgot that I was in a different country, and all times are relative.) So anyway, I was at home, had gotten my shower, making a mental list in my head of what all I needed to happen before I left and once I got there. Well, I had to find an outfit, which took a little longer than planned because the perfect one, my zipper on my jeans wouldn’t work. It zipped up and down, it just didn’t attach the two sides together. And I just couldn’t find anything else (and I realize now just how childish that sounds). Granted, not many days before all of this, my suitcase had been left in the back of a taxi with half of my wardrobe in it, so it really was kinda slim pickens in my closet. Well, I postponed the zipper to try to do something with my hair, and it wouldn’t cooperate for the world. It wouldn’t do anything. Sigh. By that point I was ready to scream. I had to pause and help Abigail where she had had an accident in the floor. I still had to get online and print or write down directions to this place. It was nightmarish. On top of everything I was not at home (my Ranburne home, or even Auburn). I couldn’t find something familiar, curl up and catch my breath. And I lost it. Bawling, I sat on the edge of my bed and cried and cried, and finally asked God to help. Well, after a couple more tries and when I let God teach me how to breathe again, I finally got my zipper to work, and had this image pass through my head of what I could do with my hair. I have no doubt in my mind that it was from God. So, it worked, and was actually cute. (And I’ve never been able to get my hair to do that same thing since!) I got everything written down and was out the door. Daddy had taught me how to breathe again. He was even still there when I freaked out (just a little this time) at the fact that there were NO taxis going that far south. Lol. Figures, right? Well, miraculously, I made it on time, early in fact. But that day, He became my Dad, one who wanted me to cry out to Him for help. He was the one that didn’t run away from my breakdown, but helped me through it, giving me solutions that only He could. They might seem like simple things, but haha.. never tell someone who is hyperventilating that their problems are simple.
"Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7
Friday, July 16
We are...
"For it is we who are the circumcision, we who worship by the Spirit of God, who glory in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh." Phil 3:3
So I've been studying this out recently. What does it mean to be "the circumcision"? The definition that I found that really stuck with me is "spiritual purification". But then again, what does it mean for us, as Christians, to be the spiritual purification of the world? In looking up other places where the words circumcision or uncircumcised are used, I found verses that talk about uncircumcised lips (Ex 6:12), ears (Jer 6:10), hearts (Lev 26:41), and the fruit of a tree (Lev 19:23). So then I had to explore what these passages told me.
When the Bible speaks of uncircumcised lips and ears, and even somewhat of the fruit of a new tree, it refers to them not working as they were designed to, or not to their full potential. It says Moses' lips were faltering, ears that were uncircumcised were not able to hear or understand the Word of God, and the tree planted in a new land had to go through a period of time before it was considered holy and before it could be eaten.
The passage that really stood out to me though, was Leviticus 26:41-42, about our hearts. It says "when their uncircumcised hearts are humbled and they pay for their sin, I will remember my covenant with Jacob and my covenant with Isaac and my covenant with Abraham, and I will remember the land." So in my mind, this meant that uncircumcised must be the opposite of humbled in a way. So what does humble mean? The answers I found: to lower in importance, to destroy the independence power or will of, and to make meek (i.e. submissive, compliant, unassuming, yielding, calm, patient, etc.). Haha this may be hard to follow, but here goes. So if humble is the opposite of uncircumcised, then being humble is almost the same as being circumcised right?
So, as we are called "the circumcision," we're called to lower ourselves in importance. We're called to destroy our independence, and become dependent on God. We're called to destroy our power or will, in trading it in for the power of Christ and His will. And we're called to be meek, or patient, yielding, and submissive to others.
I know I certainly can't say I've really been on course with all of those recently. And if that's what it takes to be the spiritual purification, I have some work to do...
So I've been studying this out recently. What does it mean to be "the circumcision"? The definition that I found that really stuck with me is "spiritual purification". But then again, what does it mean for us, as Christians, to be the spiritual purification of the world? In looking up other places where the words circumcision or uncircumcised are used, I found verses that talk about uncircumcised lips (Ex 6:12), ears (Jer 6:10), hearts (Lev 26:41), and the fruit of a tree (Lev 19:23). So then I had to explore what these passages told me.
When the Bible speaks of uncircumcised lips and ears, and even somewhat of the fruit of a new tree, it refers to them not working as they were designed to, or not to their full potential. It says Moses' lips were faltering, ears that were uncircumcised were not able to hear or understand the Word of God, and the tree planted in a new land had to go through a period of time before it was considered holy and before it could be eaten.
The passage that really stood out to me though, was Leviticus 26:41-42, about our hearts. It says "when their uncircumcised hearts are humbled and they pay for their sin, I will remember my covenant with Jacob and my covenant with Isaac and my covenant with Abraham, and I will remember the land." So in my mind, this meant that uncircumcised must be the opposite of humbled in a way. So what does humble mean? The answers I found: to lower in importance, to destroy the independence power or will of, and to make meek (i.e. submissive, compliant, unassuming, yielding, calm, patient, etc.). Haha this may be hard to follow, but here goes. So if humble is the opposite of uncircumcised, then being humble is almost the same as being circumcised right?
So, as we are called "the circumcision," we're called to lower ourselves in importance. We're called to destroy our independence, and become dependent on God. We're called to destroy our power or will, in trading it in for the power of Christ and His will. And we're called to be meek, or patient, yielding, and submissive to others.
I know I certainly can't say I've really been on course with all of those recently. And if that's what it takes to be the spiritual purification, I have some work to do...
Monday, June 7
I was talking to a friend last night and decided that my new ice breaker is going to be "One time I ate ______." So no more awkward silences. They will now be filled with random comments about scorpions and dog meat named snowball. :)
I feel like God has shown me so much in the past year. I left Auburn and all of my friends a little over a year ago to come to my mom's and prepare to "travel the world" as so many say. Well, I know that I have still seen very little portions of it but I am so incredibly blessed to have had even that opportunity. It no longer seems awkward to introduce myself to a stranger and have a conversation with them. It's simply nice to be understood again; although, I can't lie, I loved trying to sort through all of the chinglish.
A tidbit about me.. children have stolen my heart. Kids of all ages. They're indescribably precious. Have you ever noticed that no matter what a child does, it's so much harder to get/stay mad at them than other adults. Children seem to have the world figured out in all of the simplest ways. It makes me sad to think of how much of that we forget as we get older. We should maybe listen to them a little bit more often.
Matthew 11:25-26
"At that time Jesus said, 'I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure.'"
I feel like God has shown me so much in the past year. I left Auburn and all of my friends a little over a year ago to come to my mom's and prepare to "travel the world" as so many say. Well, I know that I have still seen very little portions of it but I am so incredibly blessed to have had even that opportunity. It no longer seems awkward to introduce myself to a stranger and have a conversation with them. It's simply nice to be understood again; although, I can't lie, I loved trying to sort through all of the chinglish.
A tidbit about me.. children have stolen my heart. Kids of all ages. They're indescribably precious. Have you ever noticed that no matter what a child does, it's so much harder to get/stay mad at them than other adults. Children seem to have the world figured out in all of the simplest ways. It makes me sad to think of how much of that we forget as we get older. We should maybe listen to them a little bit more often.
Matthew 11:25-26
"At that time Jesus said, 'I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children. Yes, Father, for this was your good pleasure.'"
Friday, May 28
Real?
I was looking back through pictures of my time in China just now, and I found myself in a few pictures.. but I barely recognized me. I looked so different. And it took me a bit to figure out what it was that made me look that way, or what about these pictures looked different. And then it hit me. I looked.. real. No mask, no fear, no frustration. Just real.
"I am writing these things to you about those who are trying to lead you astray. 27As for you, the anointing you received from him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about all things and as that anointing is real, not counterfeit—just as it has taught you, remain in him. 28 And now, dear children, continue in him, so that when he appears we may be confident and unashamed before him at his coming." 1 John 2:26-28
As I looked through more, I felt like I could really SEE it.. the fact that God could use us the most in our weakness. The beginning of my time there, when I was wasn't trying to impress anyone (didn't know anyone to impress), but really just trying to relate without words at all, was when it seems like I could relate the best.
Monday, May 3
At a loss..
For the world I can't think of what to write about. I'm tired of being here, although I know I should be doing something. The question is what? I spoke about my time in China at my home group last week, and it went well other than my overactive use of the word "um." People are starting to think I'm crazy for talking about missing colder weather. I miss my bundles of jackets and scarves.
I was up at 2 AM this morning to go on a road trip with my dad. We went to Centerville and back, delivering logs. Admittedly, I had experienced a bit of nostalgia as we broke into Oxford and I saw all the city lights. I did enjoy the storm we drove through (moreso because I wasn't the one driving), but I enjoyed the fog afterwards even more. We made it to the other side of the storm about the time it started getting light enought to see outside and it reminded me so much of the last part of Pride and Prejudice. It was gorgeous. It was a fun trip. :)
I was up at 2 AM this morning to go on a road trip with my dad. We went to Centerville and back, delivering logs. Admittedly, I had experienced a bit of nostalgia as we broke into Oxford and I saw all the city lights. I did enjoy the storm we drove through (moreso because I wasn't the one driving), but I enjoyed the fog afterwards even more. We made it to the other side of the storm about the time it started getting light enought to see outside and it reminded me so much of the last part of Pride and Prejudice. It was gorgeous. It was a fun trip. :)
Tuesday, April 6
Forgotten...
So yeah. I forgot about my blog for a while; although, I really have little new information for you. Being back in the States is... I don't really know how to describe it. Boring for the moment. I'm job searching (like probably 3/4 of the population here). I've applied to Shorter University in Rome, GA for this Fall. I am baby-sitting, pet-sitting, cleaning, and lots of little odd jobs to stay busy. I've also decided to spend time studying different cultures and languages while I'm out of school. I'm one of those strange people.. it bugs me not to have school work to do. :) I guess that makes me a bit of a geek?
Sigh. It's been a little difficult to readjust to things here, and I have my "China days" where I feel like doing nothing but concentrating on friends there and everything that happened during my time there. But it's going.. ok. I'm still learning, and growing. And Dad has used my life on the other side of the world to open doors to talk to others here that I never would have imagined. He's always faithful.
I apologize for neglecting my blog for soo long. :/ I guess it happens. Love ya'll!
Sigh. It's been a little difficult to readjust to things here, and I have my "China days" where I feel like doing nothing but concentrating on friends there and everything that happened during my time there. But it's going.. ok. I'm still learning, and growing. And Dad has used my life on the other side of the world to open doors to talk to others here that I never would have imagined. He's always faithful.
I apologize for neglecting my blog for soo long. :/ I guess it happens. Love ya'll!
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